Dr. Molly Barrow Signs Matchlines at Autism Event
posted by Dr. Molly @ 7:09 PM
0 comments
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Thursday, June 21, 2007
Responses to Dr. Molly Articles
If you have a comment about one of my articles please send it to drmolly@askdrmolly.com. Here are a few recent comments.
Boy, low self-esteem abounds in our society - great article!
Liz D.
So true, thanks!
Bill H.
Good going, Molly,
--Phil
Nudity is my burka. I'm a free sole.
LOVE THIS!!!! So very true...
Liz
Dear Molly,
This is one of the very best articles you have written -- thoughtful, insightful and gently challenging our self-righteous views of "us" and "them." We humans are one species. Over the past 30 or so years, covering remote cultures and creatures for NatGeo, WCS and others, I have lived with a variety of people in their villages and on their terms, so of course, I have learned to adjust, to be tolerant and compassionate. I loved your turning the mirror onto ourselves, our own self-serving definitions of power. Gender stereotypes can often be turned upside down, too . . . Look at the Tuareg men making up their faces and dancing for brides at their desert gathering. Illustrations are boundless.
Keep up your gentle, tolerant and compassionate prodding of our beliefs.
Love
C
PS When I read your article I was dressed in a plain cotton sundress, shoes and knickers -- exposed and vulnerable but no less powerful, feminine, capable and intelligent.
Thanks again
CONNIE BRANSILVER
Molly
Ban the burkas and bring on the bikinis!
Cheers,
Johnny
Boy, low self-esteem abounds in our society - great article!
Liz D.
So true, thanks!
Bill H.
Good going, Molly,
--Phil
Nudity is my burka. I'm a free sole.
LOVE THIS!!!! So very true...
Liz
Dear Molly,
This is one of the very best articles you have written -- thoughtful, insightful and gently challenging our self-righteous views of "us" and "them." We humans are one species. Over the past 30 or so years, covering remote cultures and creatures for NatGeo, WCS and others, I have lived with a variety of people in their villages and on their terms, so of course, I have learned to adjust, to be tolerant and compassionate. I loved your turning the mirror onto ourselves, our own self-serving definitions of power. Gender stereotypes can often be turned upside down, too . . . Look at the Tuareg men making up their faces and dancing for brides at their desert gathering. Illustrations are boundless.
Keep up your gentle, tolerant and compassionate prodding of our beliefs.
Love
C
PS When I read your article I was dressed in a plain cotton sundress, shoes and knickers -- exposed and vulnerable but no less powerful, feminine, capable and intelligent.
Thanks again
CONNIE BRANSILVER
Molly
Ban the burkas and bring on the bikinis!
Cheers,
Johnny
posted by Dr. Molly @ 9:25 PM
0 comments
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Stigmatizers Rob You of Your Life
Shrink About This
By Dr. Molly Barrow
Are you overweight and lonely? Have you suffered from bullying, discrimination and exclusion? Are you only three years old?
Stigmatization that reduces the characteristics of a person to one trait such as fat, black or old begins in children as young as three years old according to a study done by Cramer and Steinwert in 1998. Stigmatization begins with the perception of a physical distortion or a behavioral difference that allows others to reject and disgrace another human being. Negative treatment of people who are outside the norm physically is stigmatized to the point of discrimination in job applications, higher education, income level, advancement and relationships.
The media does its part by presenting ideal physical norms skewed sharply to starved looking bodies rather than healthy athletic bodies. Extremely thin biceps that one sees in photographs of Hollywood’s A-list starlets are often an indication of severe anorexia and still these sick young people are revered by the paparazzi. Is the media frenzy fascination waiting to see the death of an out of control teenager with the anticipation of an exciting car crash or train wreck?
Have you watched a movie or news reel from the thirties or the forties? The majority of the bodies are slender. Yet, one third of all Americans are now obese. What did they have then that we do not have now or is it a question of what they did not have? Additives, food coloring, preservatives, fast food, depleted soils and brain washing commercials seducing us with succulent close-ups of the sugar-wheat-dairy triad. Why don’t we feel or look like the happy people in the commercials? Oh, can they be deceiving and lying, perhaps even poisoning our cells with their fake, dead food? Even the diet business appears to be a multi billion dollar scam as most authorities caution against the yo-yo dieting that results in additional weight gain.
Lifestyle changes rather than deprivation will bring you the healthy body that you seek. If you are obese and sedentary, shamed with low self esteem then you may have a long road ahead of you to change many years of habits. Do you want to take a different path? Let us begin with the shame.
People are afraid of different. Different had life survival threats thousands of years ago. People needed to recognize their own kind, species, or tribe for safety. That survival skill remains within our psyche. If you are different – taller, shorter, heavier, lighter, darker, bigger nose, smaller eyes, whatever….people will attempt to push you out of the group, creating a tight circle of sameness around themselves so that they can feel less frightened. We are doing it everyday with skin color, political opinion and religious intolerance, as well as physical differences. Some societies like ample hips and big people. Some societies like long earlobes and stretched necks. Some value tiny feet. It is all so arbitrary and such nonsense.
It is up to you to refuse such discrimination by frightened urgent Stigmatizers. If you have a unique body part you have a right to the little corner of the earth that is yours. No one can impinge on your life opportunity or dictate to you that you must be ashamed. Only you can do that to yourself. You make yourself ashamed. So, start there. Drop the shame right now.
Charge forth amid others frightened sniggering, sarcasm, comments or stares and do what you want to do. Their discomfort is their primal fear of strangers, strange and new. Clearly, it is better to be strange than fearful. Without shame to tie you to your darkened room, perhaps you will join in with some joyful activity or take a walk in the sunlight.
Think about how you look on the inside more than how you look on the outside. Your liver is constantly trying to detoxify your dirty blood. Any positive behavior other than sitting and eating empty calories that overloads your liver and kidneys is good. Every minute you are partaking of life is a minute you are getting fit. If you are panting, then you are signaling your bone marrow to make new blood. It may be hard to keep going and your body will hurt. Your feelings may be trod upon by cruel people but don’t let anything stop you. Check with your doctor first and get a plan that is right for you. Demand good health and recognition by health providers who are often the worst Stigmatizers.
Imagine that you commit to eating six mini meals the size of your two palms of pure organic vegetables, good fats, lean protein and low glycemic carbs in addition to an hour of cardio a day that makes you breath heavily, then stretching with Pilates or yoga and add lifting light weights three times a week. Miraculously, you will change for the better. These kinds of changes are for life. No one taught us these habits when we were developing, but we as a country need them now. There is no excuse with the health education available for schools and parents to provide less than perfect health for our children today.
The point is that you can believe that you are great as you are right now. Unless you accept that you are a worthy beautiful person regardless of any differences from your society’s norm, you may not ever take that first short walk. Olympic athletes look the way they do because of the choices they make every day. Are you a Stigmatizer to yourself? You can only begin to make loving choices for your sweet body when you choose to love your Self.
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Harvard Business School, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com Love and healthy relationship advice for pre-marital, marriage, dating and business relationships. Introducing the new relationship compatibility test by psychology expert Dr. Molly Barrow on July 15, 2007.
By Dr. Molly Barrow
Are you overweight and lonely? Have you suffered from bullying, discrimination and exclusion? Are you only three years old?
Stigmatization that reduces the characteristics of a person to one trait such as fat, black or old begins in children as young as three years old according to a study done by Cramer and Steinwert in 1998. Stigmatization begins with the perception of a physical distortion or a behavioral difference that allows others to reject and disgrace another human being. Negative treatment of people who are outside the norm physically is stigmatized to the point of discrimination in job applications, higher education, income level, advancement and relationships.
The media does its part by presenting ideal physical norms skewed sharply to starved looking bodies rather than healthy athletic bodies. Extremely thin biceps that one sees in photographs of Hollywood’s A-list starlets are often an indication of severe anorexia and still these sick young people are revered by the paparazzi. Is the media frenzy fascination waiting to see the death of an out of control teenager with the anticipation of an exciting car crash or train wreck?
Have you watched a movie or news reel from the thirties or the forties? The majority of the bodies are slender. Yet, one third of all Americans are now obese. What did they have then that we do not have now or is it a question of what they did not have? Additives, food coloring, preservatives, fast food, depleted soils and brain washing commercials seducing us with succulent close-ups of the sugar-wheat-dairy triad. Why don’t we feel or look like the happy people in the commercials? Oh, can they be deceiving and lying, perhaps even poisoning our cells with their fake, dead food? Even the diet business appears to be a multi billion dollar scam as most authorities caution against the yo-yo dieting that results in additional weight gain.
Lifestyle changes rather than deprivation will bring you the healthy body that you seek. If you are obese and sedentary, shamed with low self esteem then you may have a long road ahead of you to change many years of habits. Do you want to take a different path? Let us begin with the shame.
People are afraid of different. Different had life survival threats thousands of years ago. People needed to recognize their own kind, species, or tribe for safety. That survival skill remains within our psyche. If you are different – taller, shorter, heavier, lighter, darker, bigger nose, smaller eyes, whatever….people will attempt to push you out of the group, creating a tight circle of sameness around themselves so that they can feel less frightened. We are doing it everyday with skin color, political opinion and religious intolerance, as well as physical differences. Some societies like ample hips and big people. Some societies like long earlobes and stretched necks. Some value tiny feet. It is all so arbitrary and such nonsense.
It is up to you to refuse such discrimination by frightened urgent Stigmatizers. If you have a unique body part you have a right to the little corner of the earth that is yours. No one can impinge on your life opportunity or dictate to you that you must be ashamed. Only you can do that to yourself. You make yourself ashamed. So, start there. Drop the shame right now.
Charge forth amid others frightened sniggering, sarcasm, comments or stares and do what you want to do. Their discomfort is their primal fear of strangers, strange and new. Clearly, it is better to be strange than fearful. Without shame to tie you to your darkened room, perhaps you will join in with some joyful activity or take a walk in the sunlight.
Think about how you look on the inside more than how you look on the outside. Your liver is constantly trying to detoxify your dirty blood. Any positive behavior other than sitting and eating empty calories that overloads your liver and kidneys is good. Every minute you are partaking of life is a minute you are getting fit. If you are panting, then you are signaling your bone marrow to make new blood. It may be hard to keep going and your body will hurt. Your feelings may be trod upon by cruel people but don’t let anything stop you. Check with your doctor first and get a plan that is right for you. Demand good health and recognition by health providers who are often the worst Stigmatizers.
Imagine that you commit to eating six mini meals the size of your two palms of pure organic vegetables, good fats, lean protein and low glycemic carbs in addition to an hour of cardio a day that makes you breath heavily, then stretching with Pilates or yoga and add lifting light weights three times a week. Miraculously, you will change for the better. These kinds of changes are for life. No one taught us these habits when we were developing, but we as a country need them now. There is no excuse with the health education available for schools and parents to provide less than perfect health for our children today.
The point is that you can believe that you are great as you are right now. Unless you accept that you are a worthy beautiful person regardless of any differences from your society’s norm, you may not ever take that first short walk. Olympic athletes look the way they do because of the choices they make every day. Are you a Stigmatizer to yourself? You can only begin to make loving choices for your sweet body when you choose to love your Self.
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Harvard Business School, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com Love and healthy relationship advice for pre-marital, marriage, dating and business relationships. Introducing the new relationship compatibility test by psychology expert Dr. Molly Barrow on July 15, 2007.
posted by Dr. Molly @ 10:28 AM
0 comments
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Happy Father's Day Relationship Expert Dr. Molly Barrow
HAPPY FATHER'S DAY
When you are an old man no work will ever matter more to you or your society than raising your children well. Wishing you a wonderful day of laughter and memories.
Dr. Molly
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Harvard Business School, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com
Love and healthy relationship advice for pre-marital, marriage, dating and business relationships. Introducing the new relationship compatibility test by psychology expert Dr. Molly Barrow on July 15, 2007.
When you are an old man no work will ever matter more to you or your society than raising your children well. Wishing you a wonderful day of laughter and memories.
Dr. Molly
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Harvard Business School, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com
Love and healthy relationship advice for pre-marital, marriage, dating and business relationships. Introducing the new relationship compatibility test by psychology expert Dr. Molly Barrow on July 15, 2007.
posted by Dr. Molly @ 11:04 PM
0 comments
Saturday, June 16, 2007
What's Your Burka? Relationship author expert Dr. Molly Barrow
Shrink About This
by Dr. Molly Barrow
What’s Your Burka?
Do you ever think about the artificial limits that individuals allow a society to put on them? Most blacks in America would agree there is a ceiling, a prejudice prism that blocks all but the color white in many business and social arenas. Women in Muslim countries suffer harshly from male dominance, and are expected to wear head scarves in Turkey and burkas in Afghanistan. Some women say, in front of their husbands, that they prefer to wear a burka to prevent ogling by men. Sticks and stones may break your bones, but stares will never hurt you. Muffled hearing, restricted vision and poor maneuverability from the heavy hot tents are not so different than Japanese foot binding, Victorian corsets or huge powdered wigs in London. Yearning for the simplistic uniforms of Mao’s China, yet?
Let’s think about this in more personal terms. How do you allow others to dictate and design your short life on Earth?
How far do you go in your dress to be considered good enough or deemed “appropriate?” Do you curl your eyelashes carefully and coat them with toxic tar? Do you squeeze your hard working toes into pointed high heels that cause bunions and back aches to grow? Do you take a colored piece of material and tie it intricately in a neck bulge like a turkey’s wattle? Do you wear a wool blend jacket at work in the heat of summer? Surely these behaviors appear ridiculous and odd to all uncivilized societies.
I understand why we brush and floss our teeth after eating. Athletic shoes are a great boon to our exercise program. But society loves to dictate to others old left over behaviors that are simply ridiculous.
For example, let’s say a female writer must go out on an interview. Many would agree the writer’s uniform consists of pajama pants, a worn, soft, Pima cotton t-shirt, flip flops and a sweatshirt. The process of changing into a corporate person is lengthy and uncomfortable. Starting at the bottom, we begin with polished toenails hobbling in spiky heels, constrictive nylons squeezing one’s blood flow to a trickle, a panty-line-free thong (what the hell!) and a skirt that requires one’s knees to be glued together when bending, removing ones carcass from a car or sitting in a deep chair. This is an impossible task and eventually earns one the reputation of a Sharon Stone Flasher.
My Goodness! We are only dressed waist high. Continuing on, take the bra. It is not comfortable and has been indicated in breast cancer rumors. Desperately worried that our breasts will not be considered pert enough if allowed to be free, we bind them in elastic, micro fiber, and plastic. A shirt is necessary to cover up what we have just worked so hard to lift, wrap and present. Now, hang metals, trinkets and rocks from your neck, wrist, and fingers and through the punched holes in your earlobes so that you can call attention to each body part’s loveliness. Next, don the jacket, just like the boys, so you can sweat, too. Add shoulder pads to improve your power statement.
Wait, you can not go out with just your face. You must paint it first. Nine layers of toxic chemicals will be sufficient: moisturizer, base, powder, shadow, eyeliner, lip liner, lipstick and gloss. Do not forget sun block. Your hair has also been cut, colored, highlighted, straightened (just in case you look too ethnic), then sprayed and glossed. Are we frigging ready, yet?
A mist of perfume will help to mask the sweat and toxic skin cell smell. Sling a heavy cowhide sack on your shoulder, carrying your survival equipment necessary for the next two hours, and lift a briefcase with the other hand. Oh, don’t you look burkaed.
The elaborate and often painful dress code of corporate America is archaic and punishing for females and silly sweaty for males. Would forest killing, cruel animal torturers and just plain nasty people chill with a change of wardrobe? Or too terrified that a member of the Appropriate Behavior Club might find their casual dress too sophomoric, do business persons conform and join in with scorning the hippy-type rebels who indulge in “business casual.”
Tomorrow morning you will stand in the harsh light of your closet, faced with sludging your way through the ritual of looking “nice” once again? Or, perhaps, will your heart rebel as you fantasize about escaping to mountain tops, white sand beaches or a fishing boat where you are free, free to wear cotton. Choose bravely to be burkaless, if you can.
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Harvard Business School, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com Love and healthy relationship coaching for pre-marital, marriage, dating and business relationships. Introducing the new relationship compatibility test by psychology expert, Dr. Molly Barrow on July 15, 2007.
by Dr. Molly Barrow
What’s Your Burka?
Do you ever think about the artificial limits that individuals allow a society to put on them? Most blacks in America would agree there is a ceiling, a prejudice prism that blocks all but the color white in many business and social arenas. Women in Muslim countries suffer harshly from male dominance, and are expected to wear head scarves in Turkey and burkas in Afghanistan. Some women say, in front of their husbands, that they prefer to wear a burka to prevent ogling by men. Sticks and stones may break your bones, but stares will never hurt you. Muffled hearing, restricted vision and poor maneuverability from the heavy hot tents are not so different than Japanese foot binding, Victorian corsets or huge powdered wigs in London. Yearning for the simplistic uniforms of Mao’s China, yet?
Let’s think about this in more personal terms. How do you allow others to dictate and design your short life on Earth?
How far do you go in your dress to be considered good enough or deemed “appropriate?” Do you curl your eyelashes carefully and coat them with toxic tar? Do you squeeze your hard working toes into pointed high heels that cause bunions and back aches to grow? Do you take a colored piece of material and tie it intricately in a neck bulge like a turkey’s wattle? Do you wear a wool blend jacket at work in the heat of summer? Surely these behaviors appear ridiculous and odd to all uncivilized societies.
I understand why we brush and floss our teeth after eating. Athletic shoes are a great boon to our exercise program. But society loves to dictate to others old left over behaviors that are simply ridiculous.
For example, let’s say a female writer must go out on an interview. Many would agree the writer’s uniform consists of pajama pants, a worn, soft, Pima cotton t-shirt, flip flops and a sweatshirt. The process of changing into a corporate person is lengthy and uncomfortable. Starting at the bottom, we begin with polished toenails hobbling in spiky heels, constrictive nylons squeezing one’s blood flow to a trickle, a panty-line-free thong (what the hell!) and a skirt that requires one’s knees to be glued together when bending, removing ones carcass from a car or sitting in a deep chair. This is an impossible task and eventually earns one the reputation of a Sharon Stone Flasher.
My Goodness! We are only dressed waist high. Continuing on, take the bra. It is not comfortable and has been indicated in breast cancer rumors. Desperately worried that our breasts will not be considered pert enough if allowed to be free, we bind them in elastic, micro fiber, and plastic. A shirt is necessary to cover up what we have just worked so hard to lift, wrap and present. Now, hang metals, trinkets and rocks from your neck, wrist, and fingers and through the punched holes in your earlobes so that you can call attention to each body part’s loveliness. Next, don the jacket, just like the boys, so you can sweat, too. Add shoulder pads to improve your power statement.
Wait, you can not go out with just your face. You must paint it first. Nine layers of toxic chemicals will be sufficient: moisturizer, base, powder, shadow, eyeliner, lip liner, lipstick and gloss. Do not forget sun block. Your hair has also been cut, colored, highlighted, straightened (just in case you look too ethnic), then sprayed and glossed. Are we frigging ready, yet?
A mist of perfume will help to mask the sweat and toxic skin cell smell. Sling a heavy cowhide sack on your shoulder, carrying your survival equipment necessary for the next two hours, and lift a briefcase with the other hand. Oh, don’t you look burkaed.
The elaborate and often painful dress code of corporate America is archaic and punishing for females and silly sweaty for males. Would forest killing, cruel animal torturers and just plain nasty people chill with a change of wardrobe? Or too terrified that a member of the Appropriate Behavior Club might find their casual dress too sophomoric, do business persons conform and join in with scorning the hippy-type rebels who indulge in “business casual.”
Tomorrow morning you will stand in the harsh light of your closet, faced with sludging your way through the ritual of looking “nice” once again? Or, perhaps, will your heart rebel as you fantasize about escaping to mountain tops, white sand beaches or a fishing boat where you are free, free to wear cotton. Choose bravely to be burkaless, if you can.
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Harvard Business School, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com Love and healthy relationship coaching for pre-marital, marriage, dating and business relationships. Introducing the new relationship compatibility test by psychology expert, Dr. Molly Barrow on July 15, 2007.
posted by Dr. Molly @ 5:48 PM
0 comments
Thursday, June 14, 2007
MEN'S BOOK OF THE WEEK
BOOK OF THE WEEK
Gordon Clay publisher of the mega site MENSTUFF.ORG has selected Dr. Molly Barrow's new book on relationships and finding the right partner as the Menstuff BOOK of the Week. Please check out their fabulous site for men covering issues like health, current events, movies, and relationships. Dr. Molly Barrow's book Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love is featured on their home page and throughout the site. Thank you MENSTUFF.
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Harvard Business School, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.comLove and healthy relationship advice for pre-marital, marriage, dating and business relationships. Introducing the new relationship compatibility test by psychology expert Dr. Molly Barrow on July 15, 2007.
posted by Dr. Molly @ 10:51 AM
0 comments
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Beautiful Media Images Relationship expert author Dr. Molly Barrow
Do you ever compare yourself with the images that you see in magazines? Often the disparity can leave us feeling crest fallen and depressed. However, keep in mind that a team of expert have created that image using every trick in the book. Careful touch-ups to the photo can erase every flaw, draw in abs where none exist and shrink thighs with the stroke of a computer mouse. Take Faye for example. Faye Dunaway in the Tomas Crown Affair had perfect long fingernails that she tapped gently on the chess board. They were fake. Her profile was perfection with an elaborate hairdo that was fake hair. The lightening glowed with deep red and golden tones that enhanced the room and the actor's faces. Her darkly lashed eyes simmered as she looked at Steve McQueen. The eyelashes were fake. I met Ms. Dunaway when we did a picture together called Evita Perone and again at the Sundance film festival. She was a beautiful woman and fine actress but in person she looks just like the rest of the attendees superstars in their jeans and sunglasses. Cudo's to Tyra Banks in her book Tyra's Beauty Inside and Out that showed her before and after. I say this not to take away the beautiful images created by talented people, but to save the self esteem of young girls and boys who may be hyper critical of themselves. If you watch some of the popular makeover shows you will see the artistry that can transform the plainest Jane or Joe into a knockout. We often dissect our faces and bodies to focus only on our perceived flaws and inadequacies. But when we observe someone else we focus on their best traits, giving them far too much benefit. Assume you are good enough and carry on with being the best you can be at something, or just relax and enjoy your journey as a knockout or a nice person. The latter has far more value in the long run.
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Harvard Business School, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com
Love and healthy relationship advice for pre-marital, marriage, dating and business relationships. Introducing the new relationship compatibility test by psychology expert Dr. Molly Barrow on July 15, 2007.
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Harvard Business School, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com
Love and healthy relationship advice for pre-marital, marriage, dating and business relationships. Introducing the new relationship compatibility test by psychology expert Dr. Molly Barrow on July 15, 2007.
posted by Dr. Molly @ 12:06 PM
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Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Just a Nice Thought. Relationship Expert Author Dr. Molly Barrow
Radio Talk Show Host Skylar Stone just sent me this email:
Today's Message of the Day is:
Life is short, break the rules, forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truly, laugh uncontrollably, and never regret anything that made you smile.
Send to all the people you love and don't want to lose in 2007, even me. If you get 3 back, you are a great friend.
Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we should dance.
I could not agree more. Have a beautiful day today!
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com
Today's Message of the Day is:
Life is short, break the rules, forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truly, laugh uncontrollably, and never regret anything that made you smile.
Send to all the people you love and don't want to lose in 2007, even me. If you get 3 back, you are a great friend.
Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we should dance.
I could not agree more. Have a beautiful day today!
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com
posted by Dr. Molly @ 10:48 AM
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Monday, June 11, 2007
Competition Win or Lose. Relationship expert author Dr. Molly Barrow
How do you react to competition? Do you need the trophy? Often when we are judged by others, a recognition or monetary prize is the reward. Sometimes when we give our very best effort, the competition may still do a better job. Perhaps they are more experienced, more talented, more attractive, or just have natural abilities. What is important is how you react to finishing second. Some people take their game and go home. They quit, give up because they are beaten. Perfectionism that requires you to be number one or not play at all insures that you will eventually lose everything to another stronger player. If pleasing others is your motivation than only one can win and the rest will lose.
Whereas other competitive people are energised by a defeat, determined to observe, learn, practice and be better. When the process of becoming a top contender and excellent at what you do is your reward than how can you ever lose? This seems the smarter and more pleasurable way to win.
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Harvard Business School, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com
Love and healthy relationship advice for pre-marital, marriage, dating and business relationships. Introducing the new relationship compatibility test by psychology expert Dr. Molly Barrow on July 15, 2007.
Whereas other competitive people are energised by a defeat, determined to observe, learn, practice and be better. When the process of becoming a top contender and excellent at what you do is your reward than how can you ever lose? This seems the smarter and more pleasurable way to win.
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Harvard Business School, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com
Love and healthy relationship advice for pre-marital, marriage, dating and business relationships. Introducing the new relationship compatibility test by psychology expert Dr. Molly Barrow on July 15, 2007.
posted by Dr. Molly @ 5:25 PM
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Sunday, June 10, 2007
Animals Have a Right to Quality of Life Too! Relationship expert author Dr. Molly Barrow
www.tbheritage.com
TANYA
RUTHLESS*TANYA*RAGS TO RICHES*HILLARY
Rags to Riches ran a great race at the Belmont Stakes on Saturday. Because she is a filly and at a disadvantage in size and strength compared to a stallion, she ran an even greater race. Not since Tanya in 1905, has a filly won the final leg of the Belmont. In an exciting fight to the finish, she won by a nose beating Curlin, a champion in his own right. Rags to Riches did her grandfather, Seattle Slew, proud and "Team Female" all became winners, too.
But, does excitement need to be cruel? The beauty of the horse is more than enough reason to admire the species. Yet, for many centuries, men and women have demanded that the horse racing sport continues, even though breakneck speed often becomes a deadly sport to riders and animals. Just to have a few minutes of a rush, horse owners risk these exquisite animals, who receive a bullet to their head should they break their leg. Like the Romans at the Colliseum, people scream in excitement and pay money to watch the horses pushed to their extreme performance and riders topple to their death. Someday racing animals will be outlawed, just like cock and dog fighting.
If this is the "Year of the Filly" will women speak out against the use of animals to prove men's virility or to make a buck. What leader could change a multi-million dollar blood sport? If not a stallion, is there a filly brave enough to protect the country, help the poor and give back quality of life to defenseless animals.
By this time next year will presidential hopeful Senator Hillary Clinton show her strength and stamina in a race to the finish line with all male contenders? If I were President, I just might start with increasing the punishment for cruelty to people, animals and our Planet. The Colliseum and the concept of animal death for entertainment are Twenty-first Century ruins.
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com
Love and healthy relationship advice for pre-marital, marriage, dating and business relationships. Introducing the new relationship compatibility test by psychology expert Dr. Molly Barrow on July 15, 2007.
posted by Dr. Molly @ 8:35 PM
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Saturday, June 09, 2007
Seek the Truth! Relationship expert author Dr. Molly Barrow
How do you find the truth? En mass we listen to cable television or network news expecting to get the truth simplified,concise and delivered without delay. But take a moment to imagine the threads that lead from your ears backwards to the corporate owners of the television and radio programs. In order to sell thirty second spots for advertising commercials you must prove that you have a desirable and captive audience. What is essential is to have programming that locks the viewer down and stops the channel from being changed. Proven statistics dictate that the viewer will linger because of sex, violence, fear and sensationalism. Pieces of truth are woven with urgency and skewed opinion with the intent to capture the viewer until their minds memorize every ad. When your dollar speaks and you buy the advertised product, the same programming continues. Speak with your dollar and only buy products that support honest programming. Use more Internet news sites, try PBS, read newspapers and buy books written by experts and people who were actually there when news happened. Often the interpretation of reporters and the spin of corporations results in bits of headline sensationalism and little hard news. Seek the truth and you will find it.
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Harvard Business School, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com
Love and healthy relationship advice for pre-marital, marriage, dating and business relationships. Introducing the new relationship compatibility test by psychology expert Dr. Molly Barrow on July 15, 2007.
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Harvard Business School, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com
Love and healthy relationship advice for pre-marital, marriage, dating and business relationships. Introducing the new relationship compatibility test by psychology expert Dr. Molly Barrow on July 15, 2007.
posted by Dr. Molly @ 5:59 PM
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Friday, June 08, 2007
"Just Say Hi" Relationship author expert Dr. Molly Barrow
Shrink About This
by Dr. Molly Barrow
How do you feel when you are alone? Are you self-conscious and painfully aware that you are friendless? Do you imagine people are wondering why you are just standing there by yourself? Do your attempts to look like a thoughtful, independent professional—rather than a dateless wonder, seem artificial and make you cringe? Perhaps the following true stories will change the way you approach uncomfortable moments.
On the eve of my twelfth birthday, while on a glorious Florida vacation, my oldest brother, Jim, observed me at the local teen club staring at my toes and writhing in self conscious agony. I, unfortunately, was completely ignored by the rest of the joyful group of kids.
He asked, "What's the matter, Fatsinello?" (I was so skinny that calling me Fats was a big brother joke.) Ha Ha.
With a sigh, I replied, "Nothing."
Jim, with his typical insight, said, "Go find the loneliest looking person in the room, just walk up to them and say "Hi." He nodded in the direction of a young girl sipping a Coke at a distant table.
"Go say Hi," he commanded.
The walk to her table was heart pounding in anticipation of total public humiliation, having been set-up a million times before by my three brothers’ for their comedic entertainment.
The girl starred at me like a frightened rabbit and her rigid head twisted. I chocked out a lame,"Hi."
Like a double rainbow after a dark storm, her smile was gorgeous. Her shoulders dropped, she laughed and gushed how she did not know anyone here. I glanced back at Jim, who had on his smug told-you-so expression, but he, too, seemed pleased. The girl and I were best friends for the duration of my Florida vacation and because of her, I had so much fun. With a friend by my side, I came alive, was funnier, more daring, danced at the club and even allowed myself to be semi-hypnotized by the visiting magician.
I had another opportunity to try the "Just say Hi" technique. I was working for Emmy award winning Alexander Singer as his assistant for a Director's Dialogue held at the Director's Guild in Los Angeles. My job consisted of helping during the meetings and nervously inviting directors including Warren Beatty to attend the meetings. I also received a special perk - a single ticket to a workshop on the Queen Mary ocean liner.
I arrived at seven in the morning hoping that I would be discovered by a ship full of directors. I listened to several lectures and watched a few movies and then all the attendees met in the large dining room for lunch. Nearly all the people were men and seemed to know each other well. They quickly grouped together and filled up the tables. I felt self-conscious and a bit like the last one standing during musical chairs. Then, I saw a pretty woman sitting alone at a table close to the podium and I remembered "Just say Hi." She was staring at her place setting and seemed lost in private thought.
"Hi," I offered.
Like awakened, she looked up at me. She was exotically beautiful and her black silky hair shifted as she turned her head. Her slight smile was welcoming and gave me permission to join her. After thirty minutes I had fully recovered from my "last man standing" crisis and she and I chatted easily and intimately as often only two strangers can. She began to reveal to me her concern for her ailing father and she spoke of "Jack" several times. I nodded compassionately, still faking my way since I had no real connection to anyone in the room.
Then the guest speaker was introduced and walked slowly to the podium. He wore a navy blue velour sweat suit and seemed frail and bony. He spoke about his father, Walter, and the experiences of a lifetime of movie making. Many times, John Huston stopped to cough and try to catch his breath. But he would stand up tall and begin again. The audience hung on his every word and the applause was deafening quickly followed by a standing ovation. Mr. Huston waved goodbye and escaped the crowds of directors that swarmed near him to touch his tall frame or shake his trembling hand.
"Come on, let’s get out of here," my new friend said.
I followed her tall slender frame down the long corridors deep in the Queen Mary's private floors, away from the noise and crowd with no clue where we were going. She swung open a door to a finely appointed stateroom, where our speaker John Huston sat on the couch, his jacket unzipped to reveal a thin white t-shirt. I instantly knew whom she had been talking about for the past hour. Simultaneously, I broke the spike of my high heel and stumbled into the stateroom. Always one to make a great entrance, I have learned to laugh easily and amuse myself with my otherwise embarrassing moments. We all laughed together as I held up my broken heel.
"Give it to me," said the deep gravelly voice.
Mr. Huston reached out his large hand for my shoe. Here I am, in John Huston's stateroom with his beautiful daughter, Anjelica and the greatest director of our time is fiddling with my shoe. He coughed harder and longer now that he was in private quarters. Anjelica's face showed her every emotion of concern, adoration and heartbreak as her father gasped for his breath. I briefly wondered what an elegant lady like this saw in Jack Nicholson, knowing little about him then except his bad press and the sadness that mentioning his name still caused her. The senior Huston would quickly regroup after his coughing, begin teasing us, sparring, alternating critical comments with show-off funny jabs, harsh in a way that we laughingly ignored and simply enjoyed him. I was missing the workshop but I could have cared less. Amazingly, after several poundings on the coffee table, John Huston even fixed my shoe. Eventually, Mr. Huston said he needed to rest and Anjelica whispered she would see me later.
I joined the group of directors and media in the next workshop. What would any of them have given to be invited into the private world of super star Anjelica Huston and her famous father? To this day, I am surprised that I was. No directors discovered me that day, but I discovered a fascinating man and his daughter. I also learned that when shyness or self-conscious feelings threaten to overwhelm you, just say “Hi” and a new world may open up before you.
(wireimage.com)
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Harvard Business School, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers, Hitched Magazine and Menstuff. Official website: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: http://www.blogtalkradio.com
Love and healthy relationship advice for pre-marital, marriage, dating and business relationships. Introducing the new relationship compatibility test by psychology expert Dr. Molly Barrow on July 15, 2007.
posted by Dr. Molly @ 10:30 AM
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Tuesday, June 05, 2007
MATCHLINES BOOK chosen as Book of the Week by MENSSTUFF.org
Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love has been chosen as the BOOK OF THE WEEK for the men's mega site MENSTUFF.org. The site receives 100,000 hits per day and has been helping men find important information since 1982 on over 100 men's issues, holds a 4-star rating with Britannica.com and offers thousands of book reviews for men.
Author and relationship expert Dr Molly Barrow is a new columnist with Menstuff and is thrilled to be associated with and honored by this professional site that offers a university of knowledge for men.
From June 11-17, Matchlines and Dr. Molly Barrow will be featured on the Menstuff homepage. The review and a link to the book will also appear on the "Today" page starting June 11 and at:
www.menstuff.org/books/bookreviews06.html (relationship)
www.menstuff.org/books/bookoftheweek/current.html
www.menstuff.org/kidstuff/current.html
www.fatherstuff.org
www.relationstuff.org
www.letstalkaboutsex.org
www.mensissues.us
www.healthstuff.us
Please visit Menstuff and let them know how great they are.
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, “Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love,” ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author’s Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women’s Health, Women’s World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers and Menstuff. To learn more about Dr. Molly Barrow and Matchlines please visit: http://www.askdrmolly.com.To read Dr. Molly Barrow daily blog: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com. Dr. Molly Barrow White Papers visit: http://drmollybarrowpapersedu.blogspot.com/. Dr. Molly Barrow Radio: My Relationship Answers http://www.blogtalkradio.com
posted by Dr. Molly @ 2:01 PM
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Saturday, June 02, 2007
Hollywood Teens Out of Control. Relationship Expert Author Dr. Molly Barrow
What is it about fame that causes young people to self destruct? Too many famous Hollywood families have suffered the deaths of their children as a result of excess. Excess attention simply because they are interesting to watch, because they are young, misbehave and get caught, or because they have famous parents. Strangely, their mistakes and failures seems to sickly satisfy the public, who compares their own lifestyles to that of the more privileged. If someone, who has everything in opportunity and possessions, ruins their chance at happiness, does that make the rest of us have more palatable existences?
I do not see these unfortunate children as the personification of "spoiled brats" but rather as children who have been denied the lessons of childhood. The important lessons that teach you when you hurt someones feelings, break rules or take more than your share, there are severe consequences. However, not if you are a child star.
People still hang with you hoping for your glitter to rub off on them. Expensive lawyers save you from the worst consequences. And you can have all you want and more and more, regardless of what is good for you. When this undeveloped personality begins to drive, becomes sexual, drinks alcohol or uses drugs, the normal limits set by maturity are nonexistent. The child does not know when to stop until it is too late. Parents may not want to rock the boat holding the cash cow and so often they do not intervene. The kindest way to help these young people spiraling out of control may be to shun their movies, music or photos and give them time to gain maturity and learn lessons that may save their lives. One lesson may be that fame is less important than their health and the welfare of innocent bystanders.
http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com/
http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Molly_Barrow
BIO: Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, "Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love," ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics, a member of the American Psychological Association and a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, Harvard Business School, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women's Health and Women's World.
I do not see these unfortunate children as the personification of "spoiled brats" but rather as children who have been denied the lessons of childhood. The important lessons that teach you when you hurt someones feelings, break rules or take more than your share, there are severe consequences. However, not if you are a child star.
People still hang with you hoping for your glitter to rub off on them. Expensive lawyers save you from the worst consequences. And you can have all you want and more and more, regardless of what is good for you. When this undeveloped personality begins to drive, becomes sexual, drinks alcohol or uses drugs, the normal limits set by maturity are nonexistent. The child does not know when to stop until it is too late. Parents may not want to rock the boat holding the cash cow and so often they do not intervene. The kindest way to help these young people spiraling out of control may be to shun their movies, music or photos and give them time to gain maturity and learn lessons that may save their lives. One lesson may be that fame is less important than their health and the welfare of innocent bystanders.
http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com/
http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Molly_Barrow
BIO: Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, "Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love," ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics, a member of the American Psychological Association and a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, Harvard Business School, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women's Health and Women's World.
posted by Dr. Molly @ 7:26 PM
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Friday, June 01, 2007
The Game of Step Parenting. Relationships expert author Dr. Molly Barrow
Sibling rivalry can appear vicious in some families. Bantering, insults and sabotage can be great sport even in families that adore each other. A new stepparent falls into carefully laid traps by gaming children and occasionally, even their spouses are in cahoots with their children against the newcomer. When you, as a new spouse, joins an existing family, you enter a world of intricate games without a rule book.
Although the result can be a feeling of estrangement, these awkward attempts to include the new spouse in conflict resolution is, in actuality, a good sign. The new stepparent must step back and realize when you receive the blame for something that you had nothing to do with, that you must never overreact. The ball has been tossed to you. Even if the ball hits you squarely on the nose because you were not prepared, you have fallen deeply into a pit of sibling rivalry and fierce competition for the time and affection of the parent. That is a positive inclusion even though it feels like you've been punched in the face.
Catch the ball gently and toss it back, with little or no reaction or opinion as to the outcome of today's issue or battles. Do not cop an attitude. Do not try to be a star quarterback yet, just participate a little in the game. Mostly you will be ignored, blamed and scorned as any newest family member experiences. Yes, you are the little brother or sister in a family dynamic, even though you were hoping to be the leader-mother or leader-father. Over time that will change but it can takes years especially with insensitive stepaprents more concerned with their "rights" then their intrusion.
Support your spouse and let them take the lead with parenting their children for at least the first year of blending. If a child is standing directly on your toes or your feelings you get to cry out but save the discipline for someone that the children are used to listening to and obeying. Avoid blaming your spouse for the behavior of competitive and ruthless children trying to retain their power and influence with their parent. They are just normal kids that some day you will love.
Eventually, you will understand the unique game that is your new family and you will acquire the position and power that you seek given as a gift of love, not a hostile takeover.
http://www.askdrmolly.com
http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com/
BIO: Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, "Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love," ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics, a member of the American Psychological Association and a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women's Health and Women's World.
Although the result can be a feeling of estrangement, these awkward attempts to include the new spouse in conflict resolution is, in actuality, a good sign. The new stepparent must step back and realize when you receive the blame for something that you had nothing to do with, that you must never overreact. The ball has been tossed to you. Even if the ball hits you squarely on the nose because you were not prepared, you have fallen deeply into a pit of sibling rivalry and fierce competition for the time and affection of the parent. That is a positive inclusion even though it feels like you've been punched in the face.
Catch the ball gently and toss it back, with little or no reaction or opinion as to the outcome of today's issue or battles. Do not cop an attitude. Do not try to be a star quarterback yet, just participate a little in the game. Mostly you will be ignored, blamed and scorned as any newest family member experiences. Yes, you are the little brother or sister in a family dynamic, even though you were hoping to be the leader-mother or leader-father. Over time that will change but it can takes years especially with insensitive stepaprents more concerned with their "rights" then their intrusion.
Support your spouse and let them take the lead with parenting their children for at least the first year of blending. If a child is standing directly on your toes or your feelings you get to cry out but save the discipline for someone that the children are used to listening to and obeying. Avoid blaming your spouse for the behavior of competitive and ruthless children trying to retain their power and influence with their parent. They are just normal kids that some day you will love.
Eventually, you will understand the unique game that is your new family and you will acquire the position and power that you seek given as a gift of love, not a hostile takeover.
http://www.askdrmolly.com
http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com/
BIO: Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, "Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love," ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics, a member of the American Psychological Association and a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women's Health and Women's World.
posted by Dr. Molly @ 9:12 AM
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